Ever have a frustrating day at work, a fight with your boyfriend, then end up cozying up with a nice cold pint of chocolate-chip ice cream? (We thought so.) Try this exercise designed by guru Jean Kristeller, Ph.D., cofounder of The Center for Mindful Eating and a professor of psychology at Indiana State University in Terre Haute. Once you take a breath and realize that there are other solutions to stress besides rampant snacking, you're on your way to overcoming emotional eating for good. —Paula Derrow
Triggering event:Skipped previous meal
Thoughts: I'm RAVENOUS. Since I didn't eat breakfast, I can pig out at lunch.
Emotions/body sensations: Excessive hunger
Actions: Eating twice as much as usual to make up for the meal you skipped
Grab a piece of fruit as asnack or a handful of nuts
to take the edge off. Wait 15 or 20 minutes, then eat your next meal as usual.
Triggering event: Social gathering where you don't know anyone
Thoughts: Why isn't anyone talking to me? I might as well occupy myself here by the snack table.
Emotions/body sensations: Anxious, shy, heart palpitations
Actions: Eating when not hungry
Step away from the snack table, look around for someone who is standing by herself and introduce yourself. Or ask the host to introduce you to a few folks.
Triggering event: A birthday at the office. Can you say red velvet cupcakes?
Thoughts: I've worked hard all day. I deserve atreat.
Emotions/body sensations: Excited, happy
Actions: Scarfing down a cupcake (or two!) though you've just had lunch.
Split a cupcake with a colleague. Enjoy it. Then seek out your favorite person at the office and distract yourself with good conversation until the party is over.
Triggering event:Everyone else around the table is having seconds. When you refuse, your mother asks, "What—you don't like it?!"
Thoughts: I can't believe this is happening again! I guess it's better to give in than cause a scene.
Emotions/body sensations: Guilt; the desire to fit in
Actions: Resentfully agree to another helping, followed by a double helping of regret.
Tell your mom you loved it, let her know you're really full, then change the subject with a smile.
Triggering event:Ongoing problem at work
Thoughts: I feel out of control.
Emotions/body sensations: Heart pounding, anger
Actions: You go out with friends to vent—and eat and drink way too much.
Make a point of leaving work on the early side for a few nights running, take a walk or head to the gym, then curl up on the couch and get engrossed in a novel or your favorite TV show. Or join a good friend later for dinner and one drink.
Triggering event: You had a bad date. A very bad date.
Thoughts: I'll never find anyone to love!
Emotions/body sensations: Sad, lonely
Actions: Can you say chocolate?
Call your most soothing friend to vent, then do something creative—write, knit, draw or whatever floats your boat. Remind yourself that you wouldn't have time to nurture your strengths if you were constantly catering to someone who didn't get you.
Triggering event: Your boss drops a last-minute project on your already overloaded plate.
Thoughts: I'm totally overwhelmed. I'll never get all this done.
Emotions/body sensations: Tense muscles, pounding heart, resentment
Actions: You stay late at the office, skip dinner, then make up for it by eating half the contents of your refrigerator when you get home.
Bring some work home so you can leave at a reasonable hour. Before you have dinner (plan on something you really love, that feels luxurious but that's reasonable calorie wise—say, a fresh salad topped with grilled or broiled shrimp), then turn up the music and dance around the living room tode-stress. Don't you feel better?
